I have included the letters we received from the folks who attended Marie's Service. I think it is important that we have some closure on this. It has helped me to have a sense of things being complete. I thought you would like that too. And even if you never knew her, our work is shaped by who she was We will be starting these new classes this week: Using Community Resources is the Free introductory guided tour for new people. Come hear how the web site is put together and what resources we have to support you. Back to Basics 1 is the first level class for step 7 people wanting to get back on track. The week of 7/10 we will begin: Step 1: The Art of Breakfast is the basic fun class we do for newcomers. Come learn how to do it well. Then there will be no classes the week of 7/17 as I will be on vacation in Maine. I am NOT working, not doing seminars and not even taking my computer. (smile) However, we are set for the seminar in Boulder, CO On Aug 12. Click here to see the details. And I am thinking of a seminar in NYC in September 23 on my way home from Ireland. I will confirm next week. I have posted a new class schedule on line. Click here to see what is planned. A number of you have asked me how the classes work. Check the class list page for more information on this. The classes are done online with one lesson each day. You do not have to be at your computer at any set time. And please go read the questions and answers before you write to me. If you have trouble getting through the process, write the tech forum. Please feel free to pass this week's newsletter on to your friends and family. Don't forget to let me know what you like and would like to see me cover. Be sure to visit our Radiant Recovery® website and Community Forum regularly. Warmly, Kathleen **********************************************************************
July 3, 2006 ** Quote From Kathleen **
One of the markers for your own progress is the respect you command from those around you about your food habits. *********************************************************************
** Testimonial for the Week**
Thanks for this SB. I have been noticing how it all seeps in. I went for dinner with friends last week and on the journey I listened in the car... "I haven't had a thing to eat today because I was saving myself for this meal" ...and then there's me, smiling... "Well you know me. I've had my meals and snacks or else I wouldn't have made it into dinner in the first place!" They all laughed. But that culture thing is so ingrained. They all probably think, "Right, that's why Mosaic is still a bit tubby !!" But I am happy because I'm not playing that game any more. In the old days I would have kept quiet. I would have been starving on a diet, so eaten what I was supposed to all day but feeling irritable and a failure because I hadn't been able to not eat all day like them. At the same time I'd be fretting because I was going to eat in a restaurant which was scary because I'd ruin my diet and have pudding. (They had 3 courses and wine, I had one course and decaf. Had a lovely time.) It sounds like you are talking about a real success, not failing at the old way at all, but working out the right and proper way. Mosaic ********************************************************************
**Recipe of the Week**
This comes from the Radiant Recovery cookbook. If you want to make it patriotic, dollop the yogurt or sour cream on top and sprinkle some blueberries over that and you have your red, white and blue :) Strawberry Soup
Notes: If you use frozen strawberries, be sure to purchase unsweetened brands. You may wish to slightly thaw berries to make processing easier. This soup can be served as a refreshing appetizer or as a light dessert. The addition of black pepper may seem odd to you, but it is an old culinary trick which greatly enhances the fruitiness of the strawberries. Do give it a ********************************************************************
**Your Last Diet: More Than What You Think**
Make sure to come to chat this week - I have some intriguing things to share. If you are not a YLD member, come and join us. Click here if you are ready to change your life or just plain ole have fun. It is not too late to get into the classes if you come right now. ********************************************************* ***********
**David's Corner **
Please send questions and suggestions. I love hearing from you and truly want to help you do your program better. ********************************************************* ***********
**Our Online Groups**
Hi! I'm Sheila and I'm the volunteer liaison for the Radiant Movement group. I found Radiant Recovery six years ago at a particularly low point in my life. For most of my adult life, I lived a very sedentary lifestyle with little regular exercise. Finding the program and working on my recovery has been life changing for me. With support from the community, I've rediscovered the joy of movement and my body loves it. The Movement list is for people who want to start moving again and to baby step into a regular exercise program. If you can remember how much fun it was to move when you were a child and you've lost that, the Movement list is the perfect place for you. And, if you don't remember, we'll help you rediscover it. There are some wonderful people on the list who will share their stories and help you explore different options to form a movement plan that works for you.. We are enthusiastic about our own exercise, but we also understand first hand how hard it was to start and to baby step into regular movement. It's a great list; come join us. http://www.radiantrecovery.com/list_serves.htm ********************************************************************
**Reflections on Marie's Memorial Service** Kathleen DesMaisons, Ph.D. Here are the reflections from three of our community members who went to Marie's service. Friday, Gretel drove me up to Massachusetts so that we could attend Marie's memorial. It was a beautiful day - warm, with no humidity, which was a wonderful change after all the rain we've had recently. The drive up was beautiful as we drove through unbelievable green, rolling hills. We arrived early enough to walk up the charming Main Street in Northampton to Starbucks before it was time to go to the church. The church is a very old one and one of the prettiest churches I have ever been in. It had gorgeous wooden arches, stained glass windows, extremely high ceilings, magnificent organ, which was painted in hues that reminded me of New Mexico. Liz, from Vermont, who some of you will remember, was sitting in the church when we walked in. It was really nice to see her again. Also, Rene Anderson, another person some of you may remember, was there, too. The service was beautiful. Dan, Marie's brother, gave the eulogy. He shared how Marie was so much stronger than she thought she was, how bright and funny she was. He also talked about Radiant Recovery, and how important a part of her life that was. He spoke about how Marie and her siblings talked about reincarnation. He then told us that on Sunday night, after Marie had passed away that morning, a bear had torn a screen to get onto his porch and took all his birdseed. At the same time, a bear raided Marie's garage, and did the same thing! He said that being noticed and respected were important to Marie, and that he certainly noticed and respected that black bear. It was fun to think of Marie claiming her power and appearing as a large black bear. After the service, there was a reception at a nearby hotel. It was really nice to have the time to get to know Marie's brother and sister, her very good friend, Gail, and other friends and relatives of Marie. We enjoyed a delicious lunch and shared Marie stories. I found it interesting that Marie's relatives were thanking me for being her friend and for being a part of RR, which meant so much to Marie. Our online community connected Marie to a world that she was no longer able to get out into. And, I think that they got some idea of how much Marie meant to the community and how many lives she touched. Gretel had put together lovely binders for the family members that had Patti's poem on the front and a picture of the quilt on the inside cover. Then, she had printed out all the comments and sentiments from the community once they heard of Marie's death. There were lots of pages! Oh, Patti, you will be pleased to know that a copy of your poem was handed to each person who attended the service. Dan also spoke about it and how special it was during his eulogy. It was nice to see you acknowledged and thanked. Gretel decided to spend the night at my house again last night because the traffic between here and her house would have been just awful due to its being a Friday night, and the first night of a holiday weekend. My town had its fireworks display last night, and we attended. It was interesting that both Gretel and I felt Marie there with us. I thought it was a fitting way to say farewell to Marie. Her spirit will live on in each of us. She will be missed. Vicki ************************************ The Memorial service for Marie was so moving, I would like to try to recapture some of it to share with you. Vicki and I were joined by LizSR, who knew Marie through the Radiant Recovery community several years ago. Patti's poem was inserted in the bulletin and the memorial card had a beautiful sunflower on the front of it. The service began with an opening prayer and reading the 23rd Psalm from scripture, followed by us singing the hymn, For the Beauty of the Earth. (Marie so loved nature). The presiding minister in his homily wondered, 'How will Marie be remembered?' He suggested it will be through the stories we tell of her. And so her brother Dan, in his eulogy, did just that to capture the essence of Marie as he and we knew her. One of the stories was of his watching a bear breaking into his porch the night after Marie died, taking all his birdseed, how a bear also went into Marie's garage that night and did the same thing. He said it was important to Marie to be noticed and respected, and suggested Marie's spirit had been incarnated in those bears, that he certainly noticed had great respect for them! He talked of Marie's 18 years of sobriety through AA, attending meetings in the basement of the very church we were in. He told how in 1997 Marie had checked herself into a hospital thinking she was having a heart attack. What she had instead was a severe anxiety attack brought on by the overuse of sugar which she had substituted for alcohol. He talked about how that began a journey which led her to find Radiant Recovery where she found a place of value as she joined others in a worldwide network in service to offering hope to diabetics and alcoholics, where she became wrapped in the love of the community, developing deep friendships, including with Patti who wrote the beautiful poem. He spoke of Marie's fears and struggles with her 'big self,' ending with quotes from Maya Angelou and this one from Marianne Williamson which he felt Marie tried so hard to embody: "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others". The service ended with a final prayer and our singing Amazing Grace; I doubt there was a dry eye among us, I know mine weren't. As we exited the beautiful old church in lovely Northampton, stepping into the bright and beautiful sunshine of the late June day, I felt peaceful, knowing that Marie is free of pain, and very proud to be a part of the Radiant Recovery community where we work together to carry a message of hope to other suffering addicts. Gretel ************************************ Hi, All, Diane asked me to write about Marie's memorial service yesterday Friday, June 30 at 11:30 am. I had to get into Northampton early and so I went to the church early. It's a large, very old church on Main Street next to the courthouse. It was a lovely clear, warm day. As you enter, there was a table with flowers, a recent picture of Marie and friends, the memorial cards, programs and nicely printed copies of Patti's poem. On a podium next to the table was a guest book. I had never been inside this church proper before and it was a wondrously carved and windowed building. The first thing one felt upon entering was the calm, peaceful feeling. This was in part brought on by the very tall stained glass windows. The windows were mostly the warm color of the petals of black-eyed susans, with the midday light coming through. On the left side the center window of the series was of a brook, in a green glade, with hills behind and a sunset atop. I chose to sit where I could see this window clearly. In addition to the beautiful woodwork and stained glass windows, the walls and organ had been lovingly decorated. The pews were all curved and faced the central front which was surmounted with the gently decorated organ pipes. In front of the pulpit was a table set with flowers, 2 pictures of Marie's cats and a happy picture of Marie. In one of the pictures, the cats were sitting sphinx-like on a quilt topped bed looking out a window. To the left of the table was a closed piano with flowers on it. I was the first to enter and sat quietly absorbing the peace, thinking of Marie, and watching as others entered. There were quite a few people there and all her family. The Rev. Peter B. Ives started the service with words of welcome, a prayer of invocation and a hymn, For the Beauty of the Earth. He followed this with an unison reading of Psalm 23: The Lord is my Shepherd... and then a scripture reading of Psalm 121: I lift up my eyes to the hills... having first mentioned that this Psalm reminded him of the hills surrounding the Pioneer Valley where Marie had lived her life. Then Marie's brother Daniel spoke the Eulogy. He spoke of the night of the day Marie died, Sunday. How that night a bear got onto his porch at his house and ate all the birdseed. And on that same night, a bear got into Marie's garage and ate all her birdseed. How Marie believed in reincarnation and he'd like to think that the bear was Marie, reminding him that she was still among us. He spoke of how Marie had been a good sister, of her struggles, of the reason the service had been held in this church was because this was where her sobriety had started 18 years ago. He spoke of her character, how she was a loving, giving person who did not suffer fools gladly. He spoke of what a big part the Radiant Recovery program had been in Marie's life, of the friends she had made, the support she had received and given. How it had helped her in recovery and with the diabetes. He spoke well and lovingly of his sister Marie. He read a quote that I've forgotten the source of, but that speaks of fear of our brilliance and also of how dare we NOT show that brilliance, or words to that effect. I thought I had that quote somewhere but can not find it. When Daniel had finished, the Reverend spoke the Homily followed by the pastoral prayer and the Lord's Prayer. He then led the singing of Amazing Grace followed by the commendation and blessing. It was a lovely service, peaceful, moving, strong and one that encouraged the telling of stories of Marie, that she not be forgotten. The Reverend mentioned that there was a reception for family and friends around the corner at the Wiggins Tavern at the Hotel Northampton. Marie has much been on my mind this week, remembering her stories of birds, bears, squirrels and the gardens. Remembering her little helpful bits of information. I did not know her well, I wish I had. Pam R. ©Kathleen DesMaisons 2006. Here are the folks who are helping put the newsletter together: Gretel, the liaison for the recovery list and the webmaster puts it all together Naomi, liaison for step 4 gathers the recipes David, who runs the Radiant Recovery® Store talks about what new products we have. You are getting the weekly newsletter from Radiant Recovery® in response to your signup. A copy of this newsletter may also be found posted on the web at http://www. radiantrecovery.com/weeklynewsletter.htm. ©2006 by Kathleen DesMaisons . All rights reserved. You are free to use or transmit this article to your ezine or website as long as you leave the content unaltered and use this attribution: "By Kathleen DesMaisons, Ph.D. of Radiant Recovery®. Please visit Kathleen's website at http://www.radiantrecovery.com for additional resources on sugar sensitivity and healing addiction." Please notify me at kathleen@radiantrecovery.com to let me know where the material will appear. Banner Photograph by Geraint Smith |
