I had two really good days this week or so i thought. I finally had some energy and actually got some things accomplished. Today I feel like I am pushing a truck up a hill again. I had felt so good about being productive but when I looked back at my journal I was surprised to see that I had written cranky, frustrated and awful several times during those two days, and even wrote one sad.

Prior to RR and for as long as I can remember, I have said that I had one good week a month. There is pms week, the week of my cycle and then a recovery week. Then I have one good week where I go like crazy, get lots accomplished and actually have hope. I always knew there was something wrong.

After two years of RR (I am still on step three and crashing all the time)this pattern is still repeating. Although my "one good week" seems to be only 2-4 days per month instead of an actual week. I obviously still have a lot of work to do in this program but will this pattern ever go away? Is this a BE issue and not related to my daily blood sugar volatility? Or is this something else that the food will not solve?

The line from the books "The pain of the dissonance between all that you know and what you are actually able to do in your life is horrible" haunts me. Can anyone help my muddled brain?

thanks,
Laureen