Hi Kim. Welcome back
How about telling yourself you can camp out on step 3 or 4 for as long as you like, once you get there. Doing step 3 long term would make you feel much better than not doing the steps at all. There's no set time that you have to progress beyond those steps - you do it when you are ready. And I'll bet once you see how much better you feel doing step 3 for a long time, it will help motivate you to move forward at some point.
Allison
: Hi all. I used to be here some months
: ago under a different name.
: I started Step one about a year ago.
: Familiar story, I know - rushed
: through the steps up to Step 4 and
: had a huge 3 week sugarfest,
: abandoned my journal... and came
: back. I was advised to start over
: at step one, so I did.
: Since then, I have started over and
: got to step 3 or 4 a few times.
: Then I decide I need to go on a
: diet, or that I am sick of
: worrying about my food all the
: time, or I get depressed and
: craving and go with it. So I leave
: the plan, then come back to step
: one. Truthfully I get spooked at
: step 3 or 4, because I know
: getting rid of white food and
: sugar is coming, and I don't
: really want to do that. Or I
: REALLY don't want to do it.
: My most recent "fall" took
: place in June. My oldest son got
: married (which is a happy thing -
: I enjoyed the wedding and love his
: wife). But since then I have been
: so depressed I am having trouble
: functioning. Time passing, and
: having my kids grow up and move on
: seems to have me in tears half the
: time and when I am not crying I am
: picking fights with my poor
: husband.
: Breakfast is the one thing I have
: kept steady, so I am starting to
: journal again, and for the first
: time I am actually seeing things
: in it. Like, I feel terrible and
: angry in the evenings if I have
: coffee and chocolate in the
: afternoon. I am hoping I can stick
: to it this time; if I don't feel
: better soon I may have to consider
: antidepressants and I so do not
: want to do that.
: Sorry for the long post, I am using
: my real name now (I used to be
: called Vanessa which is a nickname
: my husband used to use), and I am
: going to try to post every day,
: even if it is just breakfast and
: something to be grateful for.
: Today was oatmeal with protein
: powder, milk, nuts and
: strawberries. And coffee. It was
: delicious. And I am grateful for
: this forum of people who
: understand.