Lea,

Your story echoes my experience too. You used a phrase, "biochemically different," to describe what was necessary in order for you to become neutral about what others were saying to you or asking of you.

It make me think, oh yes, we become "biochemically INdifferent" to sugar and requests that we eat it! Biochemical indifference is the biochemical difference.

I really liked reading your story, thanks!

Joy S

: Ah yes, my husband is generous too,
: and he pouts thinking of sharing
: sundaes together.

: But we have been together for this
: journey, I found RR in 2002, and
: he knows I used to eat and then
: fall asleep from the sugar crash.
: Oh, and I was so irritable all the
: time.

: He's seen the slow, not overnight
: changes in me, and he wouldn't go
: back. It's just so much more
: pleasant to be around me,
: nowadays, with the food holding me
: steady.

: He's still as attentive, but now he
: offers applesauce, and only after
: a meal, lol. And his brother just
: surprised me by buying local
: peaches. I have it made, I know!
:

: I remember nearer the start though,
: when I was still working Step 3.
: (I was three months on Step 3,
: after doing all the steps at once,
: crashing, and being encouraged to
: do the steps mindfully, to get all
: I could out of them. It was really
: a challenge for me to get all the
: parts and hold it steady.) I would
: get frustrated, thinking, this has
: got to change, I can't keep having
: people think that offering me
: sweets is okay! And I fussed and
: fretted about it.

: The conclusion I have come to, after
: my second, slow way through the
: steps, is that my changes were
: needed first, before I could try
: to change others.

: I could be as simple and direct as
: possible, turning things down, but
: it wasn't until I was
: biochemically different, with the
: steps under my belt, and ready for
: Step 6 (hey, for me, 6 months and
: I was finally ready...), that my
: attitude changed
: internally/biochemically, and it
: really was "would rather
: leave it don't really think of
: that as food, thank you". I
: wouldn't say that, of course, that
: would be rude...

: And for others, I lost the notion
: that I was a drug dealer if I gave
: them their sugar. After all, I
: needed it to stay steady, when I
: was on Step 3 - and I was being
: gentle with myself. Why would I be
: any less gentle to someone I love?
: I want to see them succeed, and
: simply not having the sugar just
: sets us up for spikey existence.
: Not my idea of a good thing.

: Anyway I am rambling now. I smiled
: when I saw your post, because yes,
: oh yes, that was so familiar...

: Pleasantly,
: -Lea (snoozey no longer!)